Kelly’s Unnecessary Blog

This photo just about sums up the lengths I go to every morning to make myself presentable. My lengths are shorts. My only goal is to be clean. Beyond that, things pretty much happen au natural.

I shampoo, condition, and wash in the shower. Sometimes I shave my legs. I dry myself off, use a store-brand version of Oil of Olay on my face and some pretty-smelling lotion from Bath & Body Works on my arms and legs along with a few squirts of matching body spray.

The first effort I make at looks is to pat on a little undereye concealer and draw a few lines with a black pencil. I clean my glasses with the special cloth that I let Lenscrafters talk me into buying. I apply deodorant, and then I can put on my bathrobe.

Then it’s time for the hair. The towel comes off and is shaken in the bathtub. I comb my hair and fluff the furrows with my fingers. Then comes the second effort I make at looks—I shoot the blowdryer at it for about 45 seconds. That’s just enough to get rid of the watery wetness so that the air can take over. I used to dry the shit out of my hair; I was 24 before I realized how curly it had become after puberty.

I take a multivitamin and calcium supplement and get dressed, and then I’m on my way.