Zombie Apocalypse
September 13, 2010
If zombies suddenly busted through my wall, the first things I’d likely have within reach would be two remote controls and my faithful companion. Possibly my iPhone.
CJ is a creme puff who would be more likely to crawl into the zombie’s lap (if it happened to sit down for a rest before savaging me) than try to defend me against it. My only hope would be if she purred it into oblivion. On the other hand, maybe it would be so charmed by her that it would forget about taking a bite out of me (and hopefully her).
I can’t imagine I’d fare much better with either remote control. One is for the TiVo, the other is for my stereo through which I run the audio. If the zombies were susceptible to certain kinds of music (like the aliens in Mars Attacks! were to Slim Whitman), maybe I’d have just enough time to put something on.
But I’d probably just be eaten. Would you fare better?
The day in bike ride: September 4, 2010: Bridges
September 5, 2010
I only intended to go to the Mill City Farmers Market to get something to eat from Chef Shack. I did, and then on my way back, I got a sudden bee in my bonnet to just go on a little bike ride. So I did. And paid attention to the undersides of bridges.
These are all bridges over the Mississippi River between St. Anthony Falls Lock & Dam and Lock & Dam No. 1. There are three not pictured because I didn’t get the idea right away.
Bridge to nourishment: bacon beer brat from Chef Shack.
Photo 1: 10th Avenue
Photo 2: Remains of the I-35W bridge that collapsed in 2007 are still spread out on the Bohemian Flats near the University of Minnesota.
Photo 3: I-94
Photo 4: Franklin Avenue
Photo 5: Railroad bridge between 26th and 27th Streets . I would seriously doubt that it’s still used for train traffic.
Photo 6: Bridge to hydration
Photo 7: Lake Street
Photo 8: 46th Street. This one seemed quite cathedral-like to me as I stood under it.
Photos 9–12: Bridge on the Mississippi: Lock & Dam No. 1. I had a little staycation with this as I hadn’t realized that you can walk all around the facility. There is a catwalk that bridges the two locks (it seems only the 9-footer is used), and then it’s quite parklike on the dividers between the various channels.
Photo 9: Bridge to observation, catwalk
Photo 10: The 6-foot lock, which doesn’t seem to have been used any time recently, as there were some quite large shrubs growing in the far end of it on the wall.
Photo 11: Bridge to dinner, if you’re a spider.
Finally, I leave you with this video of the dam’s waterfall. That’s a blue heron flying around. There were also white herons, ducks, and geese.
There were more bridges on the second half of my ride, but unfortunately, my battery died while I was enjoying the Lock & Dam. Maybe I’ll go out again this weekend to capture those.
The day in bike ride: August 29, 2010, with bonus errands
September 1, 2010
My new big thing is the Chef Shack food truck. It’s two chef gals who make amazing culinary delights. They usually post the menu on Facebook, and Saturday morning they also posted a photo of the charcuterie plate that they had on offer at the Kingfield Market in south Minneapolis.
photos © Chef Shack
I didn’t get myself going quickly enough to get down there by the 1:00 end time, so I instead went to the Uptown Market where they also were (I think they have three vehicles—two trucks and one trailer), figuring I’d get it there instead. The round trip to Uptown is about 8 miles; on the way home I jogged down to the store to pick up some necessary items and that added another couple miles.
Photo1: entering the Hiawatha commuter trail.
Photo 2: heading southish on the Hiawatha commuter trail to meet the Midtown Greenway.
Photo 3: heading west on the Midtown Greenway at 11th Avenue.
Photo 4: Midtown Greenway at 4th Avenue. Thanks for the heads-up, sign.
Photo 5: Bryant Avenue South and 29th Street. I lived in this apartment building for 11 years. Three blocks along 29th are where the Uptown Market is on Sundays.
Photos 6: The market, looking west.
Photo 8: Waiting for my order. It turned out that they didn’t have the charcuterie plate here, so I ordered the bison burger instead.
Photo 9: Bison burger with pepperjack cheese and chips. Dining on the curb in the shade. It was quite hot but not too humid so it was just barely tolerable for the exertion of the bike ride.
Photo 10: One of the many gardens along the Greenway, at Harriet Avenue South.
Photo 11: Heading back east along the Greenway. Access ramp at Park Avenue South.
Photo 12: The Greenway jogs north across 28th Street to cross the busy Hiawatha Avenue/Highway 55.
Photo 13: Target. Errand stop number one.
Photo 14: Cub Foods. Errand stop number two.
Photo 15: Cheese!
Photo 16: All items procured. I think this will work.
Photo 17: Approaching the weirdo intersection of Minnehaha, Franklin, and Cedar Avenues.
Photo 18: 20th Avenue, just about to cross Interstate 94. The home stretch.
Playing with food
August 22, 2010
I never had my own Mr. Potato Head when I was a kid. My one clear memory of it at somebody else’s house was during a babysitting event. My parents had dropped me off at the house of some people with kids my age. I can’t remember who they were, but I do remember that they had a Mr. Potato Head, and also that we spent quite a bit of time sliding down the stairs on our bellies causing me to be covered in rug burns by the time my parents picked me up.
Today when I went to the store, I forgot to get a potato to make a real Mr. Potato Head, so instead I introduce you his cousin, Mr. Pepper Head.
Head: red bell pepper.
Hair: cilantro.
Ears: tomatillo halves.
Eyes: fresh mozzarella balls and whole peppercorns.
Nose: jalepeño pepper tip.
Mouth: yellow bell pepper slice.
Items held in place with toothpick pieces.
Not such a cheap date
August 21, 2010
Yesterday’s goal was to buy the cheapest thing on the menu. Today’s goal was to spend nothing. I failed miserably, because I didn’t have time to plan ahead. That’s a little bit of a lame excuse. I do often pack my lunch for work, but the extra whammy today was my attendance at the Twins game tonight.
So in chronological order, my FAIL went like this.
Supper. I had planned to stay at the office until it was time to go to the Twins game, but because I switched bags and forgot my key, I had to leave when the last other person left. That spurred my decision to check out the Town Ball Tavern within Target Field because I had plenty of time. As you would expect, the food was overpriced, but the Summit pints that I am powerless to resist at the ballpark were, at $6.75 each, 75¢ less expensive in the Tavern than on the concourse. I ordered the Twin Towns Turkey Sandwich (I think that’s what it was called), which was basically a grilled cheese and turkey sandwich, for $10.50—exorbitant, I know. I had three bargain beers as well.
At the end of the sixth inning, I could no longer take sitting in my seat, packed in on a warm and humid night with no breeze to circulate the stagnant air, so I retreated back to the Tavern where there was air conditioning and big screens and had one more bargain beer. Total beer savings, $3.00.
Post game. By game’s end, I was hungry again (stupid beer) and so popped in to Pizza Lucé on the way back to my bicycle for a delicious slice of pizza with chicken, mushrooms, and onions, $3.95. Wonderful as their beer selection is, I did resist the temptation and just had some nice, cold water.
So that was fourteen hours, two meals, and one event out of the house. Grand total: $51.45. Ouch. It’s no wonder I’m always out of money.
Cheap date, for one meal anyway
August 20, 2010
In sort of the same spirit as my recent foray to Himalayan Restaurant, tonight I visited Chai’s Thai Restaurant, which is the restaurant nearest to my home that I have never been to. The goal this time was to order the least expensive thing on the menu. I had two choices, edamame and fried tofu.
I think it’s safe to say that recently I have been on a bent to sample new and weird foods. And when I say weird, I only mean stuff that you won’t find at Applebee’s. I certainly do not mean that I think the various ethnicities that inspire the dishes are weird. On the contrary. It’s very interesting to experience new things and it’s a little bit of an adrenaline rush if you feel a little uncomfortable in the process.
I have had edamame before which is why I ordered the fried tofu. And I have had tofu many times before as well, but not in a form that was fried, or at least not the way I was imagining this would be fried tonight. Now that I think about it, I guess I was making certain assumptions because it was in the Appetizers part of the menu.
With entree items in the past, the tofu has come in inch-square cubes, browned and obviously at least sauteed, which I suppose is technically, basically, fried. For some reason I subconsciously figured that this fried tofu appetizer would somehow be crispier.
And it was. It was sliced into quarter-inch thick squares and had obviously bathed in the deep-fat-fryer for a few minutes. It was served with a spicy peanut sauce and a sweet-and-sour type glaze. The tofu itself, of course, was bland, but the sauces were quite tasty indeed. I particularly liked the peanut sauce, probably because it was thicker and stuck to the tofu squares long enough to get to my mouth, versus running off like the sweet-and-sour.
It was enough to hold me until my entree arrived—pineapple duck with bok choy and vegetables. I’m sure I’ve had duck at least once in my life but I don’t really remember, so I figured it was closer to something I had never had before than the mahi mahi green curry, which also sounded delicious but the components of which I know I’ve had before. These were the two daily specials. You can see from the menu that they have lots of delicious dishes.
The pineapple duck was quite spicy and just about right. Unfortunately, the venue was not air conditioned and this was a humid summer’s day, so it didn’t take long for me to start sweating like you do with spicy food. The lighting was also very dim, so these aren’t the greatest photos ever either.
I think maybe we need to have a standing mission to try a new restaurant monthly. This has been enjoyable.
Tasty rainbow
August 17, 2010
I’m not going to go all unicorns and glitter on you, but Friday I was treated to the best rainbow I’ve ever seen. Not because it was double—I’ve seen triple—but because of its altitude and degrees.
My office suite is on an eleventh storey corner. We have pretty good sightlines. From my desk I look to the northwest which is now right across the bow of the Target Field, the new home of the Minnesota Twins baseball team. I can see the left field upper deck from where I sit. With every day game, it is rubbed in my face that I’m stuck at work and 44,000 other people aren’t.
Probably two or three times a day otherwise, I find myself standing at the kitchen window with looks northish over the fairly new Minneapolis Public Library Central Branch (which sports a green roof and is LEED certified), and toward the Mississippi River and iconic Grain Belt Brewery sign. Minneapolis’ Federal Reserve Bank is also in view. There is some interesting public art on its grounds.
But last Friday, it was Mother Nature who was in the spotlight. This has been a pretty hot, humid summer, and the latest stretch was approaching the end of its second week when the second of three quick-succession fronts rolled through.
Being downtown, we quite often don’t get the severe aspect of weather, but this summer we’ve definitely been getting the downpours. Friday we got another one. At one point in college I was a meteorology major. The weather still fascinates me. I look out five windows that look westish while sitting at my desk slaving away. I pay attention.
The cats and dogs had been falling for a good ten or fifteen minutes, but as with many summertime thunderstorms, the sun was poised to quickly follow on the heels of the line of clouds. I knew what was coming.
I stationed myself at the kitchen window and waited. The colored arc began to appear. I had my iPhone at the ready. I was rewarded.
People know I’m excitable anyway. So when I started shrieking “Rainbow! Rainbow!” they didn’t pay too much attention. When I modified it to, “Freaky rainbow! Come look at this! You won’t be sorry!” I got some results.
I figure there were two things at work. First as I said, we’re on the eleventh floor, higher up than my usual rainbow viewing vantage point. And second, I was watching the rain finishing, with the trailing 99% humidity. I was on the front line of rainbow formation, and I was expecting it.
But I wasn’t expecting what I was presented with.
What I first noticed was that the rainbow was low and close. So low and close that while the zenith of the arc was above the library, the ends went behind the corners of the library (look closely at the left-jutting cantilever). And when I followed the left end of the arc, it came around to the street in front of the building kitty corner to mine. It was a 135° degree rainbow. I wasn’t quite coordinated enough to get a photo of that. But other people saw it, too.
I completely understand that some of you looking at this photo are scoffing to yourself that this is just some Photoshop trickery. If I hadn’t witnessed it myself, I’d be skeptical of its authenticity, too.
I have witnesses. Also, take time to notice and appreciate the small things.
Starring as me
August 16, 2010
Who would you want to play yourself in a movie? I’m not asking who is your celebrity doppelgänger. I’m asking who would be able to channel the inner you on the big screen?
Figuring this out occupied my thoughts as I laid in bed last night waiting to fall asleep. I had initially thought that maybe Zooey Deschanel could be the one, because I love her quirkiness, but she’s also kind of wispy, and I’m not wispy. The second name that popped into my head was Janeane Garofalo. I thought that I should try to consider more possibilities but quickly realized that there was a reason why Ms. Garofalo came to mind.
I thought about what I know about her. If put under pressure to name movies she was in, all I’d be able to come up with without looking is The Truth about Cats and Dogs and that superhero one (by the way, that skull bowling ball that she used wasn’t just a prop). What I remember is that she does dorky and class clown, awkward and a little attractive, wallflower but underestimated.
I figured she’d be the one to be able to pull off portraying my type of personality in a believable way. I’m not a starlet, glamour girl type, and it was just a happy coincidence that there was a little more of a physical resemblance (beyond the dark hair) than I had realized.
Through the years there are celebrities I’ve been said to resemble. In my early twenties, it was Joan Jett and Martha Quinn. More recently, it was Mary McDonnell. I don’t really see it beyond hair color and/or style.
Back to doppelgängers. I learned of the website myheritage.com, where you can upload a photo of yourself and it will come up with celebrity look-alikes. I did it five times with different photos. I didn’t try to trick it for four of them, though when I kept getting a particular result, I did, as a last resort, give it the sunglasses photo just to test it. Naturally you have to take these things with a grain of salt. First, my matches were almost all men. I accept that. But second, some of the more outlandish matches it gave me included Prince Harry, Desmond Tutu, and Jessica Simpson. What?
I was relieved that it did return Janeane Garofalo one time (coincidentally, the same photo that I chose to use of her). And I was a little bit flattered that it gave me Gary Oldman twice, because I really like him. But who was the celebrity that it gave me all four times? James Spader. I’m not sure what to think about that!
Yay, baseball and cool fronts
August 14, 2010
Moon walk to the world
August 13, 2010
If we were to take a little moon pie a la monde and establish the first colony on Earth’s satellite, what would we want to have with us? It’s interesting that as each person noted their own favored item, we actually ended up with a pretty well-rounded selection of near-essentials.
My own answer was fresh food. I do my best to stay away from processed junk and I’m not sure that freeze-dried rations wouldn’t just send me over the moon, so to speak. I love my steak, I love my grilled veggies, and I love salad, lots and lots of salad. I weighed these things against other things that I love, such as music, my computer/the internet, my pets, beer, and so on. Really, my answer should have been drinking water, because more than all those other things and the things yet to be noted, I love feeling hydrated.
So, what else would we take with us?
After taking care of his own need for SPAM, @jackcomrie thoughtfully added a grill on which I could prepare said steaks and veggies. And I’d be happy to cook for everyone. I know it’s grueling to work your way up through the ranks, but I bet I’d be a good restaurant chef. It was probably mere coincidence that there was red wine on the grill leaf. I do really like a good Sonoma zinfandel with my beef. Or Bell’s Oberon beer.
@a_noob took care of a couple of things. He brought the beer so I didn’t have to. And then he decided what the hey, bring the whole damned Honor Oak pub and our friend @rabbitdan. To that I say huzzah! Because the pub is the perfect place to go with your friends, and reluctant as I am to admit it, in the end I do like having people to do things with every now and then. On the moon you’d probably get bored a lot and be glad there were others to do things with.
And one of those things I like to do with someone who is my friend, @merendis brought along—a lover! Really, if you were establishing a colony on a previously unoccupied celestial body, there’d end up being a whole lot of loving going on between all sorts of interesting pairings, appropriate and not appropriate.
When you were hanging out in your moon quarters having some quiet time, you’d want some comforts of home. That would include scratching your furry sweetie’s ears (@thedigitalghost) while surfing the internet (@discomeg2) via satellite and downloading the latest best-sellers (@stephie) and syncing it all via your laptop (@jenaissance).
Of course to run it all, you’d need some sort of power, which @philos-phobos thought to provide, and you wouldn’t want to overlook some basic creature comforts such as water (the elixir of life and universal solvent, thanks to @cigee25). With those spacesuits, you’d probably quickly develop a huge appreciation for the right kind of toilet paper. I am currently stuck with twelve double rolls of a kind I don’t like. It’s only six dollars or so, but I can’t bring myself to bale on it. I will very much more appreciate the other kind when I go back to it.
Let’s not forget aesthetics. @saxchik is taking care of the decorating with some color stimulation. Even with all these other fantastic things we’re bringing along, we might still go crazy if all the walls were moon-ash grey. Three cheers for the color spectrum.
If all else failed, I suppose we’d be quite happy for those freeze-dried rations. @mandy716 and @chaomancer are skipping over the meat and going right to the pudding. And that’s okay. Because as the first moon colony, we would almost certainly experience some insanity, and if a little dish of ice cream, freeze-dried though it might be, was enough to assuage you, well, that would be perfectly acceptable.
Kelly’s Unnecessary Blog 